These Are Crazy, Crazy Nights
by The Tygre
Summary: Jinx and Raven are headed out for their first  extra-dimensional  date! Of course, things can't be that simple for our two plane-hopping lovebirds. This Week: The Hound of Tindalos! The Shadow Shawl of Arachnadia! Raven's half-demon side usurped?
1. Speak Softly and Carry Witch Girlfriends

_"How far away the stars seem, and how far is our first kiss, and ah, how old my heart."_

**~ William Butler Yeats**

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**"There's no way I can remember all that." Jinx said bewildered.

"You won't have to remember it. It's like Kresk said; I know the way. We just need to listen for a door with a jahi face on it." Raven reassured her pet.

"Oh... What's a jahi? And how do you listen for it?"

Raven let out a breath that might almost have been a giggle. She had to admit; Jinx was adorable perplexed. The hex caster was dressed in the ensemble of a voodoo priest to the Baron Samedi; a swallow-tail coat over a button down shirt, leg-hugging tux pants, leather loafers, and a skull mask which the rapscallion had currently lifted on to her downy hair for the night, all toned to silken black with outlines of gold and inlays of scarlet.

Jinx's partner was a bit more regal; a black silk dress (with a petticoat over the torso), under-laid with a dark gray mesh, to match a bone adorned veil, two matching gloves and a large shawl completing the ensemble. Raven's motif for the night was spiders, because, as can only be stated so many times, there's only so much that fashion can do with carrion birds without looking pompous or vagabond.

Adjusting her shawl, Raven explained, "A jahi is a type of succubus, only not as powerful. And that's being generous. No wings, limited shape-changing, barely half of the magical talent; weaker in almost every possible way. Their only advantage is their stomachs; they can hold a swallowed soul for days."

Jinx still looked confused, mewling, "Oh… And that translates to door form _how_, exactly?" This time Raven really did let out a dry, but honest chuckle, slightly grinning as she wrapped her arms through Jinx's, "It will have two faces on it, I guess. I'm more worried about listening for it."

"Yeah, that was another thing… I didn't know that doors make sounds. Well, y'know, aside from *creeeak* and stuff like that."

"Apparently jahi doors do."

"Sooo, what do we do now? Just wander around until we _hear_ a particular door?"

"I suppose. I hope this doesn't take long. The night only lasts so long…"

"Think of it as a romantic stroll, right through the creepy, hellish back-rooms of an alcoholic monster with destruction issues!" Jinx punctuated the statement by kissing Raven's head on the spot between the half-demon's mystical chakra and her hairline. Another soft crow escaped from the cambion. Raven murmured, "Alright, I'll give you that." The each other in their gazes for a moment too long, before Jinx looked ahead and asked plainly, "So, left or right?"

Raven almost hummed as she led Jinx, "To the right, ever to the right."

"A dead end, apparently a dead end." Jinx hastily quipped. Indeed, the hallway was a trap, stopping promptly into a wall that bore the portrait of a seven-head beast devouring angels. Now Jinx took the lead, wrapping her arm around Raven's waist and placing her hand on the sorceress's hip. Jinx continued, "Well, at least now we know that… the door was directly behind us all along. Huh."

Raven's slight grin melted with a tired, "Oh no. It wants us to play."

"Wha- What wants to play?"

"I can't really say. I knew something was watching us, I could even hear it moving around, but I thought it would let us pass. Evidently, it won't. Not without a game first."

"So what's the game?"

"From the looks of the markings on this door… The game is 'Go through the door or we're not getting out of here.'"

"Can't you walk through walls?"

"Can't you tear them down?"

Jinx flustered, "Good point…" Raven continued, "Even if we tried to go out another way, whatever it is that's following us will just change our direction again. One way or another, we're going through the room beyond this door."

"Do you think it'll be dangerous?" Raven let out an honest smile as she cupped Jinx's cheek and kissed the tip of her nose, promising, "Don't worry, sweetheart. I'll keep you safe. If it so much as lays a claw on you, I'll rip it in half."

"Hey! _You_'ll protect me? I'm the one wearing the pants tonight, in case you haven't noticed. Anything moves, and I'll blow it to smithereens."

"I know. That's why you're going first." Raven said with a wicked smirk. Jinx glared at her date for setting up a trap like that so quickly. Still, credit where it was due, it was a very clever trap. Jinx reached for the door, placing her hand on the door knob. She couldn't help but notice that Raven was grasping her free hand rather tightly, something both worrying and massively comforting.

The opening blue door seemed to drag air behind it, or perhaps it was the room taking a much-needed breath. The room was long, with a concrete floor and cinder-block walls. Shelves lined the walls and ran down the middle of the corridor-like chamber, their contents unknown. The sides of the ceiling dangled a sparse amount of fluorescent lights. A pungent, dusty smell danced on the dry air.

Jinx felt her legs want to move back. Nothing good was in here, at least not anything that would prolong her life. But before she could so much as shove a toe away from the door, the meta-human was aware of Raven scooting past her shoulder, through the door, and dragging Jinx by the hand.

The door slammed shut. For a brief moment, all the lights went out. They were back on in an instant. At the other end of the room was a new door, identical to its predecessor. Raven was aware of her lover's grasping hand extending to an intertwined arm, like the branches of two trees interconnecting with each other. The couple began to walk forward.

The two were instantly aware of the rattling. Up above, something on the ceiling was following them, clattering and clicking, the crack of dozens of joints moving along in a dancing unison. When they stopped, it stopped; when they moved faster, so did the presence. Jinx tried to distract herself by looking at the shelves around her.

The room's macabre details utterly failed as a refuge for the nerves. Some of the jars held shelves filled with a multicolored liquids, cradles for lumps of flesh, grotesque worms, and even what looked like the fetus of something not entirely humanoid or demon. A hook occasionally hung from the ceiling, attached to an iron chain. Metal seemed to form an important part of the grim tapestry; boxes of saws, pliers, knives, screws, and needles all rested against oddly out of place books with vexing titles like "Crossbreeding and You!", "Eugenics; the Slow and Easy", and "Parasite Grafting for Profit and Pleasure".

And ever still was that clacking sound. It seemed to make the journey longer, the room a canyon that stretched miles. And who knows? Maybe the presence did; it was certainly able to move the door around with ease.

The door was just ahead. A normal person, an average human being, would have been relieved. But a meta-human and a half-demon knew better. Their set their ears to the air, and their eyes to the shadows. The lights flickered off again, darkness engulfing the pair. Not even Raven's piercing gaze or Jinx's feline stare could see so much as their hands in front of them. And then the lights came back.

The two let out a startled yelp. Standing next to the door was what could only be described as a shrine. A waste barrel supported was ringed by chains on top of it. Underneath the barrel, piles of books, jars, and old boxes served as supports. Crowning the barrel was a montage of jars; eyes, ears, tongues, lips, a preserved pair of shark's teeth, and even an undersized brain, all illuminated by a lamp taken from the walls and put behind the jars, casting a sickly light through the organs and their preserving liquid. Written in black ink across the barrel was the word "Korper".

"Okay, Rae… I'm freaked out now. Can we please get out of here and let –it- win?" Jinx mewled as she inched towards the door.

"Yes. I do believe we can. Just don't move too fast; it might chase us." Was the half-demon's reply. The two started inching towards the door, not even sure if it was unlocked or not. And that was when something yanked on their hair.

Unnoticed by the couple, the clacking sound had moved behind them and placed itself directly above them. The two felts hands fumble on their heads and grab their apparel; Raven's veil and Jinx's mask were both pulled off. The meta-human and the cambion weren't even thinking at this point; they were just screaming while Raven tossed open the door and threw herself and Jinx out. The two panted for a moment before the clacking reached a crescendo. A laughing, musical hiss came from the room, tittering, "Sometimes we become more than succubi, little half-breed."

Far too many skeletal arms reached out of the shadows and wrapped around the door, drawing back into the darkness and closing the portal. The new door was a curving figure eight, with holes into the dark behind it. A dry whistle flowed through the punctures, and the door seemed to be emblazed with the caricature of a woman with a second face for a stomach.

Raven and Jinx took a moment to catch their breaths. Jinx let out a groan as she realized, "Oh no… We have to back through that coming home, don't we?"

"I hadn't thought of that until you mentioned it. Thanks." Raven retorted, leaning against a wall. Jinx leaned next to her, letting out a wry, "You're welcome. Y'know, most girls wouldn't go to this much trouble just for a date with you." Raven smiled as she leaned over Jinx, pinning an arm over the hex-caster's shoulder, and breathing out, "You're not just any girl, sweetheart. You're mine." Practically drowning in her cotton-candy scent and inviting eyes. Raven leaned in and took Jinx's sweet lips for herself.

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**Guess who won the poll? Well, I managed to get a story out before the Summer ended. (HA! Take that likelihood!) Needless to say, I can't even write a pairing story normally. No~ooo, it has to be some overblown, longwinded planar romp. Now sit back and enjoy the comedy stylings of me attempting to write romance. And between two girls no less; yeesh, I'm out of my element.  
**

**'Cause that's how I roll, Children of the Night. PEACE OUT! Gorgo, Mormo, and the Thousand Faced Moon be with you.**


	2. Strangers in the Lamplight

"_This is a work of fiction. All the characters in it, human and otherwise, are imaginary, excepting only certain of the fairy folk, whom it might be unwise to offend by casting doubts on their existence. Or lack thereof."_ ~Neil Gaiman

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Raven pulled back as Jinx panted a little, "_Wow_."

"I'm incredible, I know. Now let's get moving again." Raven said, tracing her finger on the hex-caster's cheek. Jinx straightened her hair and looked around, wondering, "Yeah, where are we exactly? Is this Rose Road?"

"Primrose Road… and I don't really know." Raven confessed. The two witches had stumbled into a dark area. The door they had come out of was on a railed platform made of a kind of ash-white wood. A floating lantern illuminated a set of wooden stairs that led off onto a dirt road. In the distance, Raven and Jinx could see the dirt path leading to a lamp standing reclusively.

The air was chill and damp, with the smell of wet leaves and mulch coming from all around. From what she could tell, Jinx thought they were in a forest. The path was surrounded by long grass, and around the lamp up ahead was a row of tall, oak trees. Something was off, though. It was like the plants were black and blue, and mist seemed to crawl on the ground. No night-bird sang, and no wind blew, though the trees almost seemed to rustle in greeting and anticipation.

"So… this isn't creepy." Raven said. Jinx noted, "And whatever was back in the last room wasn't?"

"I'm starting to think Kresk didn't know what he was talking about when he gave us these directions. They might have been different when he went."

"He could be trying to kill us." Jinx joked.

"No, just you." Raven quipped. Jinx's face blanched, and her eyes went wide. Even though they were both tied to Raven, neither the witch nor the demon were on speaking terms all that well. She wouldn't put it past the Fire Demon to try and kill her like this. Raven saw the worry on Jinx's face, "You know I'm kidding, right? Trust me, demons don't do things subtly, Kresk least of all. He's just taking some time to settle into you, that's all. He's very protective about me and… well, anyone, especially 'mortals'. And even, if he did want you gone, he'd have to go through me first. I don't think he's that spiteful… or stupid."

"Why, did he try this before?"

"No. When we first met, we had a fight. I broke some of his ribs, knocked out an eye, cracked his jaw, ruptured some kidneys; like I said, a fight."

"Some fight…" Jinx said, a little awe-inspired. She had no idea her girlfriend could do all that to something as big as Kresk; but, then again, that much harder a fall.

"I made it up to him." Raven said, "Now let's go." The pair walked down the creaking stairs, releasing several awkward squeaks from the planks. Jinx still had thief instinct in her; sounds like that were marks against her record, and more grating than most security alarms. Raven set her foot on the ground first; it was soft and just a little muddy under the half-demon's heels.

Raven helped Jinx off the step, and the hex-caster clung to Raven's arm. The meta-human shivered, though whether it was from the chill fog or some dread foreboding, Raven could not tell. The couple moved quickly, staying on their guard until they were at the lamp-post in the woods. Jinx looked up to the sky; the stars spun and twinkled like dancing fireflies, but no familiar constellation could be found in the azure vault. Raven had turned her attention to the newly revealed lamp. A white-orange glow emerged from a glass cage supported by a strangely oaken pillar. It was almost like the post had grown around the lamp. The light revealed that the trail Raven and Jinx were on went on into the forest.

Jinx was the first to note, "Okay, I'm not seeing any other lamps. Do we take this one or is this just another one of Kresk's misdirections?"

"We might not even need the lamp." Raven said, "We could probably just follow the trail."

"I'll be honest, that doesn't sound like a good idea. I mean, I can see in the dark, and this place is dim to me. Unless your demon vision or whatever can make anything out-"

"It can't."

"...Wonderful. Alright, I'm going back to get that lantern by the door. It was just hanging around, so we'll use it. The lamp here looks like its magical or something. I mean, the lantern was too, but we could at least grab it."

"Careful."

"Why?"

"You can't be too careful. We're on another plane. The rules are different here."

"Oh, come on. It's just walking back to... the... door?" Jinx looked into the grove where she and Raven had come from. The trail had disappeared, and the meta-human watched in horror as the whole platform sank into the mists, almost like it was being swallowed up by the fog. Crunching and swallowing noises came from the ground. The lamp was still perched next to the now descending door. Jinx let out a yelp, "No!" And rushed into the fog to try and grab the lantern before it was too late. Raven yelled out, "Jinx! STOP!"

Jinx managed to reach the lantern just in time to watch the mists swallow it up. The chill fog crept higher, and the cat burglar could hear things moving beyond her sight. Sparks seemed to form under the mist and in the trees. There was no toying with Jinx; the creatures had come in the dozens, maybe over a hundred. Through the mist, Jinx saw stunted, humanoid forms rushing to and fro, with smiles of razor teeth and hands wielding cleavers and knives. The creatures hissed and seemed to be made up more of slick shadow than flesh and blood. Gathering around her, the little monsters sang to Jinx;

_Here is pink-flesh, ripe with fear,_

_Tastes the best when death is near!_

_Try to run and you will lose,_

_We be goblyns, you be food!_

Sharp claws wrapped around Jinx's legs and she let out yelp, unleashing a wave of hex energy into the field. Little beasts flew into the air, laughing and squealing even as they were thrown away. One of the fiends pounced at Jinx, its toothy maw held wide open, lunging for any bit of flesh it could latch onto.

Even as a scream came from her throat, Jinx was aware of being pulled back. A black claw had wrapped around the meta-human's waist and drawn her to the lamp. Gently, Raven set Jinx down on to her feet. The goblyn swarm chased after their prey, but stopped just short of the lamp-light, backing away and screeching in fear. Raven wrapped Jinx in her arms and kissed her comfortingly, while all the feline mutant could do was hyperventilate.

"Well, at least that answers that." Raven said, still holding Jinx. The cat burglar drew away from the embrace as she asked, holding back a screech, "What?"

"I know what plane we're on. We're in Faerie, or at least a stretch of it."

"Faerie? Like, pixies and sprites and elves and... and..."

"Yes, Jinx. And unicorns. But not here. We're in one of the darker parts. Maybe even Unseelie lands."

"Unseelie?"

"Dark fae. That's the best way I can describe them. Either way, we have to get out of here. I'm guessing that there's an exit portal down the trail somewhere."

"Great! So let's get the heck out of here!"

"It's not that easy. Faerie runs on... rules. The fae themselves are very erratic, but they have laws, laws that can not be broken under any circumstances. Those laws apply to everyone in Faerie, even visitors."

"Well that's stupid! So you have to brush up on a bunch of fairy tale bull just to come in here?"

"No."

"But then, doesn't that mean just anyone who wanders in here could break the rules?"

"Exactly. The fae don't want you to leave. If you break one of the rules, you belong to the plane."

"Okay, so what stupid rule did _I _break?"

"You stepped off the trail. There was a path set out by the plane, and you refused it."

Jinx growled, "That is... GAH! God, maybe we should just head back."

"How?"

"Can't you teleport us out or something? Shadow-walk or open a gate to the Astral?"

"Sorry, love. We came in from another plane, and I only know how to get the Material Plane. If we try to reach the Shadow from here, we could get lost in it for days before I found us a way back to the Mortal Coil."

"Great. So our only choice is to walk through the forest of flesh-eating death fairies? We should have just gone out clubbing, like I wanted to."

"We are going clubbing. Just think of this as walking through downtown. Except downtown wants to eat your skin."

"Thanks... Alright, so I'm not seeing any lights ahead. Now what?"

"We take this one, if I had to guess."

"What, the lamp-light? How do we- Oh, right. Some of us have been trained in fire magic."

"You weren't complaining when I gave you that back rub."

"You owe me one now. I'm calling it. Right now. You owe me a heated back-rub."

Raven smiled gently as she agreed, "Deal. So I guess I'll be the one to light the way. Give me a second." Raven concentrated on the lamp-post the two were standing next to. She sent her senses crawling up to the light, and began to wrap her shadow magic around the glow to pluck it down like an apple from a tree. Her magic was almost around the enchanted flame when it started to fizzle and spit sparks.

Raven pulled her shadows back, letting out a shocked gasp. Jinx stepped back, but kept her hexes at the ready. The glass cage holding the light broke apart, and the two witches thought they saw something at the heart of the light move. Like a will o' wisp, the magic glow lifted itself up and drifted in front of the couple, letting out a sweet but disinterested yawn.

Looking at the apparition more closely now, Raven and Jinx saw that their suspicions were confirmed; something was at the core of the light. In all likelihood, the minute figure before them was the light itself. Resembling a petite woman no more than three inches tall, what could best be described as a wingless pixie floated. Her sharp face was still tired, and short, curly hair frazzled. Her skin was an odd texture, like thousands of motes of little diamonds and gems. She glowed yellow, orange, and white, each pigment starting as a splotch on her skin before growing or shrinking. The fae's dainty feet were scaled and clawed, and looked far too small, some what like a humming-bird's. The little faerie let out another yawn as she asked, perturbed, "What? What do you want?"

Jinx and Raven stared. The fiery sprite grew annoyed and began to fizzle, "So which one of you saps pulled me out of my nap? I haven't got all night to play the guessing game."

Raven, somewhat confused, asked, "Are... What exactly are you?"

"Well that's obvious, stupid; I'm a fairy. This is my fire, and somebody pulled me out of it."

"Your fire?"

"Yes, _my_ fire. It's my flame, and the flame is me. Then, I'm guessing one of you two started messing with it."

"That was me." Raven said, trying to adopt an air of confidence. There is a certain attitude that one needs when dealing with Fae, and Raven did her best to call on it. "So you're the spirit of this light? Interesting. Maybe you can help us."

The sprite scoffed, "I would do that why? You tore me from my lantern, woke me up after centuries long sleep, and now you have the gall to ask for help? I don't think so."

Jinx piped in, "Maybe we can work something out?" The fairy glared at the meta-human, buzzing, "And what would we work out, wee mortal-ling? What do you have to offer me?" Jinx was about to say something when Raven stopped her, sternly interjecting, "Nothing, yet. But you can start by offering us a name."

Amused, the fairy inspected the two witches, and with a smile said, "You may call me Illea. And yours?"

"Rachel. Just Rachel." the cambion said with a stern look in her eyes. The fairy maintained her smile as she whispered and nodded towards Jinx, "Oh, and what of her name?"

"No. That trick won't work. A name was promised, a name was given, and a name was returned. Unless you have something else to offer, then she is under me. She and I are Rachel together."

"Not a true name, I reckon? Ms. Rachel?"

"Yes; but Illea isn't your full name. I know that for fact."

"Hrm hrm. Clever girl. Now, what do you want with me, before I go up in smoke again?"

This time it was Jinx who spoke, carefully choosing her words. Raven had marked herself and Jinx as the same; it was strange, stranger still to hear her lover's human name. So it was with great caution that Jinx said, "When the two of us came here, we sought a path through the forest. We were told that the way was lit by lamplight. But you're the only light here. We... request? Yeah, request... Request that you show us a -safe- way through the forest."

"Oh, nicely worded, little witch. But why not walk yourselves? Does your bonnie lass not control the light, as she did when she wrenched me from my nest?"

"She does... but the shadows here have monsters in them. And not the kind we normally deal with. They almost took a bite out of me. Trying to move through them would be like trying to swim through sharks. Except the sharks sing. And have little knives."

"Aye, tiny knife sharks can be a problem. Hungry goblyns even more so. But there's a little one little thing you forgot; why should I care? What's in this for me?"

"... Basic common courtesy?"

"Not a chance. You two are on your own unless you pony something up for me."

"Alright, well, what do you want?" Illea burst out into a rain of tinkling laughter. Her fiery mane flew all about, and sprite couldn't help but curl in on herself as she giggled out, "What do I want? I want a great many things, little witch, and I doubt you can give them to me."

Jinx furrowed her brow and said, "Try me." As Illea straightened up, she smirked and whispered, "I want the silver out of the moon, and for King Oberon to wed the Queen of Air and Darkness. I want the gleam in Jereth the Goblin King's eyes and two of every springtime green. I want the sound a baby bird makes for my own and half of all of great Tiamat's horde. I want gems to sleep in and shoes to burn for solstices. Can you give me that, lass?"

"I... guess not."

"That's what I thought. But I tell ye what. I'm feeling generous... so I'll take something from you. But what? Hmm... The pink in your eyes? The deftness in your fingers? Or how about a night with your lass, all to myself?"

Raven and Jinx both exclaimed, "No!" Jinx went on, "God, why couldn't you just ask for something normal, like money or a favor or getting a magic sword or whatever? Why do you need to try and get all this weird abstract stuff off of me?"

The sprite's eyes took a predatory gleam as she smiled and hissed through her teeth, "Because I be what I be, and I be one of the Fair Folk. I am one of the daughters of the earth, and all the dreams and thoughts that come from this blessed land. I be no more than a finger on Faerie's hand, stretched out to hold ye. I am made up of things you can't touch or even say in as many words as you like. I'm bits and pieces of dreams that you forgot, and thoughts you could have had but never did. I'm the child of gods that were never named and worlds made old at your home's creation. You ask me why I want such strangeness from ye? Because what else could you possibly give me. Trinkets, treasure, time; those things don't matter to me because they don't matter to you. I ask for what I want, and what I want is what you hold near and dear to your heart. For what else could possibly have any value than that?"

Jink watched the sprite the whole time, tracking her like a cat watches a canary. Jinx finally scoffed, "Pfft. Lot of tough talk for a pipsqueak like 'ye'. Look, if you don't know the way, then fine. But quit messing around with us, alright? You're just embarrassing yourself."

The little sprite was looking flustered now, the proud and hungry glint in her eye replaced with indignant outrage. Illea retained her poise long enough to hiss out, "How dare ye. Do you have any idea who I am?"

Jinx casually purred, "Yeah; someone who doesn't know the way. So... why are you here again? I mean, wasn't that your whole deal, your reason d'etre? And you can't do it so... I guess I'm kind of confused here."

Illea finally burst, her skin blanching to a hot white with her hair literally inflamed, "You impudent little -bitch-. I'll tear out your eyes and leave you to the goblyns. I'll use your skull for a roof and your fingers for a fence. I'll-"

"Do nothing." Raven finally stopped the fairy. Jinx was already weaving a hex in her hands, and Illea was edging ever closer to the meta-human's face. The sprite spun around to the half-demon and hissed, "And why be that, _mongrel_?"

Not losing her cool for a moment, Raven casually explained, "It's easy really. Kind of funny; like it was staring me in the face the whole time and I just couldn't see it. It almost makes me feel stupid. Almost. What the situation is this. We need to get to the door at the end of this trail. The trail, though, is blocked by flesh-eating goblyns. Alright, now here's where _you_ come in. You have a special magical energy that keeps aforementioned goblyns away. Not only that, but you know the way to the door. Okay, now here's where it gets tricky; we want you to take us to the portal out of here, but you want something in return. Now, while you were bragging about being a 'daughter of the earth' and all that, I suddenly realized something. Something important."

Raven's hand shot out and grabbed the flaming pixie, holding the sprite in an iron grip. Raven looked down at the burning fae and smirked as she said, "I'm stronger than you. _So_ much stronger. I've killed nightmare beasts with my bare hands. I've banished demon lords and cursed dragons into eternal torment. I've stared apocalypses in the eyes. I have dined in Nessus; _I have seen The Devil_. And you, you little fairy... You are not even a mote in my eye next to them. You're a pest, vermin. I could kill you right now without even blinking."

Jinx could only watched, fascinated and horrified. Raven's shoulders had hunched as she held Illea, and heat emanated from her body. The half-demon's eyes had a feral light dancing in them, and her pupils thinned every so slightly. Illea had lit up like a roman candle, faerie fire engulfing Raven's hand; the cambion didn't even notice. The fiery sprite spit out, "You wouldn't dare! There are rules! This is my land!"

"And how _sad_ is that? Just look at yourself. You're nobody. -Nobody-. There are no travelers on this road, there haven't been for years. So why are you here? What makes you stay? You can't even control the goblyns. They fear you, or at least your glamor, but follow you? Not a chance. And where are your sisters? If this road was a path, shouldn't there be more of you? Why aren't they helping you now?

And that's how it all makes sense. You're not here by choice. I don't know who you pissed off, but someone got tired of you and your little friends. So they locked you up; little lanterns, living guides through a forest that would eat everyone else alive. You were trophies, diversions, nothing more.

And then, they forgot you. They just left you here to the wilds, hoping that you would all die, one by one. Which you did. Maybe the forest took the cages, or maybe you all escaped; either way, you broke free, and nature took its course. But you? You were clever. You opened your cage just enough, but never really left. You knew better.

And that's been your life for... probably longer than the last ten generations of my family. Combined. Sitting here. Waiting. The scraps of some petty punishment in the backwater boondocks of a lost planar path. Alone, forgotten, thinking you've got it made just so long as you're alive. Hoping that every time you're woken up, things will have changed.

And you have the audacity, the sheer stupidity to try and get me to work for you. You honestly think that I would let you try and hold the Sword of Damocles over my head? You don't serve anyone, you don't belong to any court. You're free range, so let me put out my terms now. You're going to show us the way. Period. No charge, no task, no fee. Because I can always get that light out of you by myself. There are all sorts of ways; I can just kill you, or maybe I can drain your soul. But maybe, just maybe, I'll be dramatic; I'll bite your head off and take all that sweet fae essence for myself.

So, to recap; show us the way, or I'll end you."

Jinx and Illea stared horrified at Raven. Illea's flame had withered to a spark, and Jinx was slack-jawed. As if suddenly aware that this was not how normal human beings acted, Raven stood up straight and readjusted herself. The cambion grimly asked the fairy one last time, "Please."

A light shot out from Illea, and lanced through the forest. Darkness cut away, a few slimy goblyns slinking into the receding shadows. Rushing through the woods, a set of stone monoliths in the shape of an arch rushed through the woods, glowing with Illea's light. The oak doors were covered with ivory, but swung inward, revealing the path out of Faerie. Raven turned around to Jinx and gently whispered, "Sweetie, you first." Still traumatized, Jinx went through the archway by herself. Never letting go of Illea, Raven followed, stopping when one foot was past the door.

At last, Raven let go of the glowing pixie. Illea floated there for a moment, a look of scorn and hatred on her face as she hissed, "I'll remember this, _mortal_. I can live so much longer than you. All I have to do is wait, until the moment is ripe. Then, at your lowest, my venom will flow." Raven casually put her finger on her chin and thought for a moment, still watching the sprite. Finally, the half-demon intoned, "I'm not new to immortals, you know. So, think fast."

Raven's shadow magic shot out like a scorpion's stinger, piercing the fae in the stomach. The fairy watched in horror as shadows consumed her, turning her light into darkness, her soft lamp-light glow into dusky twilight. Soon, her pallor was all but monochrome. With utter terror, Illea heard the goblyns gathering around her, sharpening their cleavers and licking their lips. The sprite could only look at the grinning Raven with a mix of disgust and pleading, "But... I did what you wanted me to. You said I would live!"

Raven's eyes took on that familiar feral gleam again as she mocked, "The thing is... _I lied_. You can threaten me all you want. But my girlfriend? She's where I draw the line. That's my limit Fare thee well, fairest of folk."

As Raven went through the door, the last she saw of Illea was the darkness coming in around her, met with the smallest of screams. Raven turned around to find Jinx petrified with a mix of awe and terror. Stunned, the meta-human murmured, "Wow."

Like the cat that just ate the canary, Raven said, "I know. I'm amazing. Now let's get moving again."


	3. Down Shadowed Streets

"T_hey are lean and athirst!" he shrieked... "All the evil in the universe was concentrated in their lean, hun__gry bodies. Or had they bodies? I saw them only for a moment, I cannot be certain."_

~ Frank Belknap Long, _The Hound of Tindalos_

* * *

"So... yeah, are we gonna' talk about that?" Jinx cautiously asked. "Talk about what?" Raven nonchalantly replied.

"About how you just went psycho back there and brutally killed a fairy. I mean... sweetie, I know you can get a little wired up sometimes, but don't you think that was just a little off the handle?"

"No. She threatened you. I have limits, and she pushed them. I pushed back."

"Yeah, right into a swarm of shadowy, man-eating monsters."

"What, I should have gone easy on her? You don't know immortals like I do. She would have hounded us for years. I couldn't allow that. And I didn't hear any complaining when I got her to pull up the door. Gods below... How much time did we waste there? I should have just killed her sooner."

"Whoa! Relax! I know you're in a hurry, but we've still got plenty of time. The night is still young and all that."

"It might already be too late! We've only got so much time, and what if we were in a temporal flux zone and... Argh! Let's just hurry."

"Why? Do these tickets have an expiration on them or something?"

"No, but I'm supposed to meet someone there. Old Night's- We should have been at the Garden of Darkest Delights by now!" Raven was obviously flustered. Jinx stayed near, but something in her gut told her to keep a distance. Her lover was moving quickly now, with a lean and hungry gait. It was a wonder she could walk so fast in those heels.

The two witches had exited the wooden doors of faerie into a strange compartment. A bizarre mix of woodland trees and stone pillars stood about a rectangular grove. Lanterns of all sorts hung from the low branches, and the lighting was a dim orange with tints of bright yellow from some of the lanterns. Incense hung in the air from lighters and shrines, filling the two witches' noses with the smell of lilacs and mint. The ground was littered with tables and chairs, and a foot-path led off into the distance. The tree branches overhead obscured the sky, but in the distance, Jinx thought she saw mountains. Her view was suddenly obstructed, and light gleamed off glass where once there was only empty air. It occurred to the hex-caster that the whole area was moving, and a screaming whistle told her why; the whole grove was a train-compartment.

Jinx kept a distance between her and Raven. Wrath was always one of the shadowcaster's flaws, and even Jinx had doubts about whether she was immune to it or not. So it was with great caution, and maybe a hint of suspicion, that Jinx asked, "So... We're meeting someone? Who? Anyone I should know about?" Raven growled, "No... yes... Let me think for a minute!"

"Sweetie, calm down. Whatever it is, it's not my fault."

"You think I don't know that? It's just-"

"We'll be late. I get it. Now what are we going to be late for?" Raven paused for a moment. She looked forlornly into Jinx's eyes as she muttered, "I'm sorry. I don't mean to take it out on you. This isn't your fault, it's mine. I should have been careful, I should have checked out the trail."

Jinx calmly reassured, "Well thanks for saying it, but that doesn't answer my question. What is so friggin' important?"

Raven stuttered, just for a second. She couldn't look Jinx in the eyes as she confessed, "I... may have had an ulterior motive for this date. It was all supposed to work out so smoothly. We would meet with him, get to walk in the Garden after that. Now it's all gone to Hell."

"So this wasn't just a date? Then what was it for? Why did you drag me along with you?" Raven looked a little shocked, even indignant as she retorted, "Dragged along? You wanted this as much as me!"

"No, I didn't. I was excited because you were excited. I wanted to make you happy. I told you that I was cool with just hitting downtown, or even just staying at home. But you kept going on and on, so I talked myself into it. Now I've almost been eaten, twice, cursed by a fairy, and had you rip my head off!"

"You should have said something! You kept going along with it and never said anything! You even asked me to get you a spare ticket!"

"Well screw me for wanting to be with you!"

Silence hung in the air after that. Tears were welling up in Jinx's eyes, and Raven was taken back. She looked like some awful truth had just been revealed to her, something that had been right in front of her and was only now revealing itself. The beleaguered cambion muttered, "I'm... I'm sorry. I should have-"

"Forget about it." Jinx snapped, "Let's just go." The meta-human marched off down the wooded path. It was only after a few seconds that Raven yelled out, "You don't know where you're going!" Not making eye-contact, Jinx marched back out of the forest, got behind Raven, and miffly turned her back on the half-demon.

Raven only stood there, wringing a loose end of her shawl in her hands. Finally, she began to move through the forest slowly. Jinx let her move a few steps before following, keeping a distance. But this space was not one of fear, but rather one of punishment. Raven was dragging Jinx along now, not carrying her.

The two witches emerged into the next car of the train. The arboreal setting remained, lamps and all, but the light revealed a grove of statues overrun by weeds, ivy, and moss. All manner of foulness stood in stone. Gorgons, and hydras, and chimeras dire, born from the mud, the muck, and the fire. Twisted anatomies encased in rock loomed in the bushes, while heinous winged freaks peered from on high. At the far end of the compartment, the exit stood. Wooden doors encased in a rounded arch with a gold frame, lights seeped in from the cracks between the circular frame and door on to the ground.

Raven went to the door to inspect it. Jinx stayed behind, not caring any more or less where the shadowcrafter went now. All she wanted to do was go home, and forget this whole awful night. The meta-human rest her arms on one of the numerous statues, a lump almost as big as she was and as incoherent in shape as the last few hours. The hex-caster watched her date at the door.

For her part, the violet-eyed cambion was perplexed. There was no handle, no knocker, no indication whatsoever on how the door was to be opened. Running out of options, Raven pressed her ear to the door. A hissing, hacking, violent cough came from the other side, making Raven withdraw quickly. The growling utterance muttered angrily, "What? Who is it? What do you want?"

The cambion hesitated, "Uhm... My name is Raven. I was told the password is 'Jack'. May I come in?" The voice was silent, though Raven could hear heavy wheezing behind the door. Another cough preluded the voice asking, "Who sent'cha?"

"What?"

"Who. Sent. You. I can't let'cha in if you don't know the right blighters."

"I was told to come here by my master Kresk."

"..."

"Roughly seven feet tall? Red? Weighs about a quarter of a ton? Has to have parasitic liver flukes flushed every few decades?"

"Yeah, sounds right. Gimme' a sec to align the door."

"Wait; where else can this door go?"

"Practically anywhere you want. Course that costs you." Raven looked back at Jinx. The meta-human gave the half-demon a cool glare. Turning back to the door, Raven said, "I want you to open a way back to our home."

"Finally!" Jinx groaned. Raven didn't look back as she explained, "You can go back. I still need to get to the Garden." Jinx's expression turned to one of disgust as she sneered, "So, what? You're just dumping me here?"

"No, it's not that. Well... Maybe we do need some time apart..."

"What?" Jinx screeched. A pink aura was surrounding the meta-human at this point, and her fingers dug into the boulder that she had been resting on. Light burst from within the rock, a sickly blue-green emanation. Raven was still looking into Jinx's eyes as the stone crumbled into gravel. Jinx backed off, looking at her palms before staring at had once been a boulder. The voice from behind the door came out again, this time desperate and anxious; "Whatwasat? What happened! Whad'ja break?"

Raven sighed as she turned back towards the door saying, "It's fine. It was nothing. Just a boulder."

"Ther're no plain ol' rocks in there, lil' lady. Those are all statues. Used to be things alive. You bust one open and now it's out! No way you're comin' through now!"

"Well what was that in there?"

Jinx scowled, "Oh. More monsters. Joy. What's this-" The hex-caster was cut short by the sound of three trees falling in the glade. Looking at the felled oaks, Raven and Jinx could both clearly see the precision sharp cuts. Something growled and snarled from behind the trees. A long tentacle (or was it a tongue?) extended and wrapped around a statue of a troglodyte. The stone mass was pulled behind the trees by the tongue, rather like a squid pulling a fish into its beak. There was a loud reverberating crack and dust flew into the air before an unearthly sound emanated, a tone like the baying of wolves clashing with screeching nails on a chalkboard.

The creature stepped out from behind the trees. It was a horrible beast, surely nothing of any common plane of reason. Everything about the monstrosity was off; angles took the place of curves, and obscene slopes substituted natural edges. A huge mouth filled with teeth let drool slide out on to the grass below. The two witches' mind did their best to rationalize the abberation before them out of necessity. The thing was a hound, but only by the virtue that that was the closest word that could be used to describe the sin against nature.

The monster growled, a guttural, hungry sound, and approached the two girls. Jinx panicked and hissed at Raven, "Do something, do something fast!" Raven extended a hand and lashed out with a whip of shadow energy. The bolt rebounded off the oncoming creature with a reverberating fizzle. Still the monster creeped onward, oblivious to the cambion's attack. Jinx put her hands in front of her and shot forth waves of pink energy. The hound broke apart into a slimy mess for only an instant, then reformed, its angles askew and limbs out of place. But still it crept forward, and now it almost seemed entertained, as if the two witches defenses brought it some kind of predatory joy.

Raven thought fast. Shadowy claws grabbed a statue of a basilisk and flung it at the hound. Something appeared in the air around the beast's torso; crooked bends in reality, jagged claws that folded in on themselves. The statue was cut neatly in two before it could even get within three feet of the hound. Raven grit her teeth and said, "Nothing's working!"

"Oh, to Hell with this!" Jinx yelled out. She turned around towards the door and let out a massive burst of hex energy. Trees broke in two, statues crumbled, grass died, and the massive influx of pure misfortune caused the circular door to burst inward. There was a shout of surprise from the doorman as he was slammed into the wall behind the portal. Jinx grabbed Raven by the arm and ran as fast as her skinny legs could take her.

The hound sprang. Raven could feel its long tongue almost wrap around her ankle, trying to drag her down. Jinx roughly ran over the busted portal. A loud grunt came from underneath; the hound immediately clawed through the wood, hungry for the unfortunate spring-heel. Raven watched as the non-euclidean predator dug through black cloth and grey-white flesh now tinted with blue-black blood. Jinx tugged her arm roughly and made the cambion run faster.

The two witches were exiting a dilapidated pagoda. Toppled pillars and cracked stairs led the Jinx and Raven on to a dark city street. All around, stone buildings with too-few windows stared down. The air was cold, and smelled of foul smog and wood burning. Jinx finally pushed herself and her lover against the side of one of the cold gray buildings. Chalky dust lined their hands and the back of their clothes. Without realizing it, Raven phased herself and Jinx through the rock wall.

Letting go of each others hands, the two girls looked around. The building really was empty; two or three windows and completely hollow, but it was large enough to be a four story house. Jinx rested her hands on her knees and panted, "I think... I think... we lost... we lost it." Raven wanted to collapse. But her exhaustion was only tinted with exasperation as she watched something creep in to the building.

Right at the southwest corner, a kind of bubbling substance, somewhere between slime and smoke, leaked in. It was as if it was produced by the angles of the building, the meeting of walls and floors, flat planes cutting into each other. An angular claw stepped out, followed by an unwholesome leg. Within moments, like a cicada bursting from its shell, the hound was snarling and standing before Jinx and Raven. The monster wasn't just composed of angles, it could move through them!

Jinx looked up and groaned, "Oh, son of a-" Raven grabbed the hex-caster before she could finish. The two witches soared through the air. On the wall next to them, the hound trailed its claws against the angles, following Raven upward. The young cambion phased through the ceiling again, watching as the hound emerged from the corner between the building's roof and face.

'It's never going to stop chasing us... But my magic's no good, and neither is Jinx's... I need a minute to think. She won't like it, but this will have to do.' Raven shouted to her meta-human lover, "Hold on!" Eyes wide, Jinx yowled, "What?" The felid human was aware of being tossed into the air. With one hand, Raven had thrown Jinx upwards, and with the other she had grabbed her black shawl from around her shoulders. The shawl grew and twisted, morphing into a cloud of shadows and web. Raven flew up and grabbed Jinx while deftly wrapping the shawl around both of them.

All Jinx could see was darkness. She felt her hands on Raven's shoulders, her body pressed against her lover once more. Needless to say, this experience thoroughly lacked the romance of her first embrace with Raven. A part of her wanted to just snap free and escape, or scream and shout in protest, but she couldn't bring that facet to the fore. Perhaps it was the calm, the silence around her, save for the beating of each others' hearts and the sounds of heavy breathing. Or, perhaps it was because Jinx's face was stuffed rather conveniently into Raven's chest. One or the other.

Raven finally broke the silence; "I- I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I didn't mean for any of this. I just needed a moment to think." Jinx sighed, breathing in Raven's heady scent, and sneered, "Just... Tell me what this is all about. If this wasn't for us, then what was it for? What's the point?"

There was another pause from Raven. Jinx could hear her heart, pressed against Raven. It was faster, like the wings of a moth, a panicked pace. Raven finally said, "I... I needed to see my father." If Jinx could have looked up in shock, she would have. The meta-human sputtered out, "You mean Trigon? But I thought you killed him!"

"No. Well, yes, but also no, it's complicated- Look. It's not Trigon. Trigon isn't going to be a problem. Not right now. No, my father is someone... different."

"Who?"

"You wouldn't know him. You might have heard of him, though. Graz'zt, the Dark Prince. Lord of Darkness. The Dark Man. God to the witches of New England and Spain. And a bunch of other overblown names usually involving the word 'dark'."

"So... if he's your real dad, then who was Trigon?"

" It's a long story. And this shawl's spell won't last forever."

"So, he was going to be at the Garden tonight, huh? That's why you wanted to get there. But why do you need to talk to him?"

"... Lately, things have been happening. I'm losing a grip on my powers. It feels like someone is there who shouldn't be. Sometimes I'll black out, and when I come to, my room's a wreck, or I can taste blood in my mouth. I've always been used to strange things happening around me, to seeing what others can't or hearing voices in my head. But now it's happening all the time; the voices won't stop. But the worst part, the part that really scares me? ...I kind of like it."

Jinx swore she could hear two heartbeats, that there was a reverberation to Raven's voice. The meta-human mewled, "What does it mean?"

"I don't know. Kresk didn't either. Or if he does, he put a lot of trouble into pretending not to. I need to know what's happening to me. I have to. And I thought, well... Maybe I would take you with me."

"Why? Earn daddy's approval?"

"No. Because I want you to see me for who I really am. Because I want you to understand what my life is. Because..."

"Because?"

"Because I feel safe with you."

"... You do realize that if my face wasn't currently planted into your left boob, I would be kissing you right now?" Raven laughed, a hearty sound like a nightingale's chuckle. Jinx only egged on, "I'm serious. Just, full-on making out. It wouldn't be gentle. You would lose half your face. At least."

"I'll hold you to it." Raven exulted. Jinx let out one of her Cheshire grins before asking, "So, what do we do about _it_?"

"About what?"

"About the reality-bending horror that tried to eat our faces a couple of minutes ago, that's what. I'm guessing the spell we're hiding in won't last for too much longer."

"It really won't."

"So?"

"Hrm... I have been thinking. It moves through angles. And we found it in a boulder, right? So it must not be able to move through curves. We just need to get into an orb or a sphere. I could probably make one with my powers. But we'll have to move fast once we're out. It's probably waiting for us."

"Well, then let's go. No use waiting around in here, is there? Let's send this freak packing. You and me."

Raven smiled as she whispered, "Alright. In three... two... one." Raven pulled the shawl off of her and Jinx. The hound had been waiting on the rooftop, watching the unreachable blot of shadow hungrily. Now that's its delectable contents had been released, the beast sprang forward, snarling and growling. Raven deftly dodged while still holding Jinx. Mustering her power, the shadowcaster waited for the padding of paws and the scrape of talons to reach her ears before her next step.

Raven deftly dropped Jinx where the hound had just been. The monster was now on the rooftop of an adjacent tower. As it turned around, shadows appeared under its feet. The whole top of the structure was cloaked in Raven's Stygian aura. Even now, the hound began running to the edge, but it was trapped; the top of the tower broke off and surrounded the creature in a ball of rock and steel.

It should have ended there. But the hound of Tindalos was persistent, and still so hungry. Through the cracks and fissures of the broken stone, it slipped out of its prison, hiding in the space between the rock and Raven's magic. The inconsistent creature 'burrowed' upward, trying to force its way through the dark aura, held back only by the encroaching stones that perpetually overshadowed it.

Sweat began to form on Raven's brow. She gasped out, "I can't... hold it. It's going to... escape!" The half-demon closed her eyes, trying to focus as hard as she could. She could feel the foul will of the hound, even now trying to break through. She could feel the shadow energy in her palms, ready to burst in a terrible explosion. The hound would break free, and utterly destroy her and Jinx, just for starts.

And then, something familiar happened. Raven felt someone hold her arm and hand so gently, so softly, so warmly, once more. Again, there was that feeling of someone pressing into her back, of warm breath on the back of her neck, and soft hair against her cheek. And once more, a sweet voice whispered, "Here, let me help."

There was no demon this time, no monster, no should-have-been. The hand holding Raven's was unnaturally pale but still smooth. It's nails were manicured and painted pink, and the scent of brimstone had been replaced with a whiff of cotton-candy and roses. Jinx's fingers interlaced with Raven's, and the two witches suddenly felt a surge in power.

The hound's efforts were being thwarted even faster now. The rubble was being moved at an accelerated rate, spinning into a blur that the beast couldn't grip on. But now, pink bolts of energy were flowing between the bits of flotsam, breaking every chunk into smaller and smaller pieces. The moment the hound got a grip on an angle, it broke into a dozen pieces. Now the flow had become a vortex of energy. The hound closed in on itself, forming the core of the storm. The creature let out a hideous shriek. Soon the rubble had become sand, broken down into the smallest pieces possible. With one last burst of energy, Raven ignited the shadows containing the hound; the sand melted and flowed, closing and encasing the extra-dimensional hunter.

Raven and Jinx didn't release the newly-formed sphere until it was flawless and smooth as humanly possible. The black, amethyst streaked stone landed with a loud thud. For extra insurance, Raven sank the rock well beneath the ground floor of the tower. When she was done, Jinx still clung to her. It would be some time before either one of them would realize that they still had to find the Garden of Unearthly Delights. Still wrapped in each others arms, it would be even longer before either one cared.

* * *

**Mormo! Gorgo! Thousand-Faced Moon! Look favorably on our sacrifices! Peace, children of the night! This one took a while, but I think it was worth it. Haven't had a good night like this one in a long time. Stay tuned in, folks. And always remember; you're only you in the dark.**


End file.
